Selling sexual wellness products is unlike selling anything else. Customers may be shopping for pleasure, intimacy, health, or healing — often carrying vulnerability, uncertainty, or past experiences that shape how comfortable they feel asking questions. For retailers,  independent sellers, medtailers and other professionals supporting consumers, the ability to navigate sensitive conversations with care, discretion, and respect is not just good customer service — it’s essential.

In a category that demands education and trust, how we communicate matters just as much as what we sell.

Before any conversation begins, it’s important to ground yourself in the right mindset. Customers are not coming to be judged, corrected, or rushed. They’re coming to be supported. Viewing yourself as a guide rather than a salesperson immediately shifts the tone of the interaction.

This mindset creates psychological safety. When customers sense openness and neutrality, they’re far more likely to ask honest questions and share what they’re really looking for. To help further support this, consider the following tips.

Tip #1: Normalize the Conversation Without Forcing It

One of the most powerful tools in sensitive retail conversations is normalization. Simple phrases like “You’re not alone in asking that” or “We hear this question often” can instantly reduce someone who may feel embarrassed or shy about asking questions.

At the same time, it’s important not to push customers into conversations they aren’t ready for. Let them set the pace. Some customers want detailed education; others want minimal interaction and reassurance. Respecting those boundaries is part of discretion.

Tip #2: Ask Permission Before Going Deeper

A best practice in sensitive selling is asking permission before offering more detailed information. This shows respect and keeps the customer in control.

Examples include:

• “Would you like a little more information on how this works?”
• “Are you comfortable talking through a few options?”
• “Would it be helpful if I explained the differences?”

Permission-based communication builds trust and avoids overwhelming the customer.

Tip #3: Use Clear, Respectful, and Inclusive Language

Language matters deeply in sexual wellness. Avoid slang, jokes, or euphemisms that could feel dismissive or uncomfortable. Use clear, professional, and inclusive language that centers function, benefit, and well-being.

Equally important is avoiding assumptions about gender, orientation, relationship status, or experience level. Neutral phrasing such as “for people who…” or “for those looking to…” keeps conversations inclusive and stigma-free. If a customer volunteers information that allows you to understand them better and their comfort zone, this is certainly helpful. But this may not always be the case.

Tip #4: Focus on Needs, Not Just Products

Customers rarely come in asking for a product because they want the product itself. They want what it does for them. Shifting the conversation from product features to needs and outcomes creates a more meaningful and less intimidating experience.

Instead of starting with:

“This is our best-selling item”

Try:

“Many people look for something that helps with comfort, confidence, or connection. Does any of that resonate?”

This approach reframes the interaction as supportive rather than transactional.

Tip #5: Protect Privacy and Discretion at All Times

Discretion is a form of care. In physical retail, this may mean lowering your voice, offering a quieter area for conversation, or being mindful of who else is nearby. For independent sellers, discretion may look like private messages, neutral language in follow-ups, or clear communication about packaging and billing.

Customers notice — and deeply appreciate — when their privacy is respected without them having to ask.

Tip #6: Educate Without Overwhelming

Education is central to sexual wellness, but too much information at once can be intimidating. Focus on what’s most relevant to the customer’s stated needs and offer additional information as optional.

Think of education as layered:

1. Reassurance and basics
2. Key differences or options
3. Deeper details if requested

This keeps the experience empowering rather than overwhelming.

Tip #7: Remove Stigma by Being Calm and Confident

Often, customers take cues from the seller. If you’re calm, confident, and matter-of-fact, customers feel safer. When staff appear uncomfortable, rushed, or apologetic, it can unintentionally reinforce stigma.

Confidence doesn’t mean having all the answers — it means being comfortable saying, “Let me find the best information for you.” It’s also important you end your conversation with support and not pressure.

A sensitive conversation should never end with pressure to purchase. Let customers know it’s okay to think, explore, or come back later. Phrases like “I’m here whenever you’re ready” or “Feel free to reach out with questions” reinforce trust and keep the door open.

Many of the strongest customer relationships — and future sales — begin with patience.

Why This Matters

Sexual wellness retail is built on trust, education, and respect. When customers feel safe, heard, and supported, they not only return — they refer, advocate, and build lasting loyalty.

For retailers and independent sellers alike, mastering sensitive conversations is one of the most powerful ways to elevate both service and sales.

At STIMULATE, we believe that zero stigma, thoughtful education, and intentional communication are what move this industry forward. Supporting customers with discretion and care isn’t just good business, it’s leadership that this industry demands.

Written by Nicole Leinbach Hoffman, Founder of STIMULATE. Hoffman is a frequent guest and contributor to various media outlets that have included The Today Show, Forbes, Entreprenuer.com and countless B2B publications – including having a regular column with Smart Retailer Magazine. Additionally, Hoffman has supported American Express’s Small Business Saturday as a Spokesperson and is the Author of the book “Retail 101: The Guide to Managing and Marketing Your Retail Business” from McGraw-Hill. In 2022, Hoffman was recognized as one of Women Wear Daily’s “25 Most Inspiring Women in Retail” and has been on the list of the world’s most influential retail leaders from Rethink Retail since 2015. In 2023, Hoffman was recognized by fashion retail leader American Eagle on a billboard in Times Square as a Global Change Maker with her work in retail, specifically highlighting her support of making sexual health products more accessible in retail destinations. Additionally, Hoffman has been an Adjunct Professor at Columbia College where she has taught retail marketing. Connect with Hoffman at nicole@retailminded.com.